Wife Joke “Why do you look so sad?” “I wanted to drown my worries but my wife didn’t want to go in the water.” Guy Joke I heard that it is easier to find a girlfriend when you have things in common. So girls, I like to breath. Uniform Joke I heard women love a man in uniform. Can’t wait to start working at McDonalds. Woman Joke You really are the most jealous woman I know. Oh, so you know lots of other women, do you?! Car Joke My car horn now sounds like gunshots. People move out of the way much faster recently. Fridge Joke If we shouldn’t eat at night, why do they put a light in the fridge? Politician Joke It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets. Grandpa Joke “Mom, can I play with grandpa?” “No, you just leave him hanging until the police comes.” Dirty Joke What is agony? You are a one-armed man hanging off a cliff. Suddenly your butt starts to itch. Postman Joke Famous last words of a postman: What a lovely dog you have! Cleaning Jo...
We’ll we’ll we’ll, and if it isn’t the Autocorrect. 5 and 2 had an argument. 2 1 Fun fact Did you know that when you take all the nerves from a human body and align them so they’re forming a straight line, you’ll end up in jail for a really, really long time? What do you get when you wake up on a workday and realize you ran out of coffee? A depresso. I used to breed rabbits. Then I realized they can handle it themselves. Google request: How to disable autocorrect in wife? Why are eggs not very much into jokes? Because they could crack up. What do you call the soft tissue between a shark's teeth? A slow swimmer. I went to see the doctor about my short-term memory problems. The first thing the rascal did was made me pay in advance. Does your horse smoke? No. Well, then I think your stable is burning. What are a shark’s two most favorite words? Man overboard! “Waiter, the steak is smelling very strongly of liquor!” The waiter backs up 3 steps and asks, “How’s that ...
Boss Joke Height Of Bad Luck. Your battery is at 2% and you see your Boss upload pictures of himself and his family. Wanting to impress him, you quickly comment "cool pics" but auto correct changes it to "cool pigs" and your battery runs out! Father Joke Little Johnny asks his father: "Where does the wind come from?" - "I don't know." - "Why do dogs bark?" - "I don't know." - "Why is the earth round?" - "I don't know." - "Does it disturb you that I ask so much?" - "No son. Please ask. Otherwise you will never learn anything." Friends Joke Three guys are stranded in a desert. By a stroke of luck, they find a magic genie lamp. The genie grants each of them one wish. The first guy wishes to be back home. Wish granted. The second guy wishes the same. Wish granted. The third guy says, "It feels very lonely here now, I wish my friends were with me…” Wish granted. C...
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